breaking from the norm

I'm taking a break from my weekly "Wordless Wednesday" photos to share a story instead. A situation that's been a topic of conversation between me & my spouse for many a year. Let me preface this with saying that I'm opening myself up to you all here. I'm about to share something that many, many women would never dare talk about to others, especially in a place like this, where any and everyone could learn about it. It may also seem a bit offensive for some, and I apologize for that.

Here it is - I'm a farter. Yup, you heard me right. I fart. And sometimes, I fart a lot. Fart. Pass gas. Toot. Fluff. (That one just doesn't make a lot of sense to me - it's like trying to sugar-coat poop! LOL) Breaking wind. Whatever you call it, it's the air that comes from below. It's a completely natural thing, yet so many people avoid the subject of it. Are embarrassed by it. Won't admit they do it. But you know they do. EVERYONE DOES. My daughter even proudly (accompanied with giggles) announces when she does it. I come from a family of farters. My brothers fart. Loud and proud. Stink and all. My sisters fart. Their husbands fart. We're farters. Of course, we also know when & where is appropriate. We're not work farters or church farters or funeral farters or out to dinner farters - we're home stinkers. In our comfort zones. Relaxing and being at peace. We fart.

The situation at hand is the conversation Matt & I had about it this morning. And last night. And I'm sure a few days prior. And a week prior to that. It's what we talk about so much, but it's an issue that will never be resolved. I think he has unrealistic expectations, and he thinks I just refuse to oblige his request. What is that, you ask? He wants me to hold it in when I'm around him. Not for the fact that he's objected to them in general - he lets his rip whenever he so pleases! But it's because he calls mine "EVIL" incarnate. They stink. It's very rare that they don't. I think it's genetic. Something. But they do, and there's apparently nothing I can do to change that! So, here's an example of a scenario: we're in the bedroom watching tv. He just lets them loose. Loud and proud. I let one tiny one slip, and he freaks out. I mean, FREAKS OUT! Shirt over his head, groaning, complaining, and I'm sitting there laughing! He says I need to stop doing that. I argue he can, so why can't I? He says it's because his don't stink (they rarely do), and mine do (they rarely don't). I say it's a natural thing. He says the smell that comes out with mine is something completely unnatural, something of an evil nature.

And there the conversations stays. Until the next time. Now, I have perfected the art of being able to hold in the rest of my nether-region functions. If I have to go potty, I'm really good at waiting. Believe it or not, even if it's the runs. I get those so frequently (dumb IBS issues) that I've just learned how to hold it in, no matter the pain. Of course, as I age, I'm sure that won't be as easy or feasible!

So anyway, if you feel like touching such a silly subject as this and giving your two cents, please, fire away! Make it as stinky or as flowery as you wish! I'm just wondering if anyone else sees my point of view on this! Sure, I feel for the guy to have to deal with my stink, but really, is it my control of how they come out?!? Can I change the aroma of them? No, it's out of my hands. Yes, and out of my fanny, too! LOL